DAY 03

DAY 03
YOUR FIRST LOVE

WARNING: You will probably be bored. This is for my benefit and this is very much a PERSONAL, JOURNAL like entry. So don't feel that you have to read it. :) Please. haha!

Ok, as you can see- I haven't done very good at this day by day challenge. That's not necessarily because I haven't had time, or haven't wanted to write. I have. BUT...I've been dreading this day! My first love? I really wanted to change this and make up my own DAY 03. I don't want to write about this!

Why? Because really, I don't know! I have never said the "L" word and don't plan to until I AM in love. However, I truly feel that people come into your life for a reason and you really come to love those people for that! So even if I wasn't "in love" with them, I "love" them. make sense? So it doesn't hurt to write about the things that I loved and learned :)

Side note: There are SO many people I've dated that have influenced me. But for the sake of this post, I'll just write about the ones who influenced me that I have officially "dated" and had relationships with!

So.... that brings me to the question. Every relationship I've been in has taught me a lot. Where to start. I'll start in high school. It's funny to think that a high school relationship could mean a lot to someone, but they did! So, lets start at the beginning. Kade. Kade was the boy that made ME want to be better. Kade got along great with my family and we had a fun connection with them. The thing I loved most about Kade was that he always told me how he loved my values and the way that I lived my life. He told me how I was an example to HIM. That meant a lot to me not only to feel appreciated, but it really made ME appreciate MY values as well. I will always live that way and Kade taught me that a boy SHOULD appreciate that in a girl =)

Second, there was Justin. Justin was a great friend all through high school and before we started dating. Having that friendship BEFORE a relationship was the best thing that could have happened. We were already so open and honest with each other and had such a fun time together always. Justin was someone I looked up to and really felt myself around. I dated him my JR. year and we definitely had our share of rough times! He moved to college and there were constantly problems, but we remained close. I then "sent him on a mission" haha. Yes, a missionary. But really, it was good for us! He wanted me to date, and that, I did. And I found someone else.... BUT that is the best part of Justin. We are STILL friends. After everything we still are close. That's why I love that we were friends to begin with. I could tell Justin anything and that's what good friends do! He is married now and we obviously don't talk much, but I honestly couldn't be happier for him!

Lastly, and honestly most influential to me, is Jason. I met Jason through a blind date sort of that my friend BEGGED me to go on. It was an awkward first date, yet really fun! That next week, Jason planned something for us EVERY day that week so that we could hang out. Just the little things in order to see me every day. Well, it worked. I fell for him hard, and then I moved to provo to go to school. We had our struggles and I blame a lot of that on the distance and timing. I was at a new point in my life where I was on my own. It was new for me and I enjoyed going out and doing new things. That was hard on jason because he felt so opposite and wanted things to grow between us. This caused lots of contention and hard times for sure. However, we had some great things going. Jason taught me a lot about the gospel and was such an example to me! He is such an independent person and very motivated. Things ended roughly, and it was probably the hardest thing I've ever gone through. (This is why I didn't want to write about DAY 03!) Anyway, we decided it would be best to go our seperate ways and move on. It was a good decision, yet extremely hard. It's still hard on me to this day. I have my hard moments and I still love this boy! He has such a unique personality that brings out the fun in anyone! Things happen for a reason and we have both realized that. We both want what is best for each other and that's to just move on :) I'll always be greatful for the things he taught me, even though others might not see that. The week Jason and I split, my institute teacher happened to play us a song in class. The song was from Wicked called "for good" and it really hit home. It explains how I feel very well. You can see it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzrGFQysfYU I truly wouldn't be the person that I am today if I hadn't have met Jason. But the tears in my eyes are telling me that I'm done writing. YAY! =)

Sorry for such a boring post, but someday (hopefully not TOO far away) I'll be able to write about my true love :)

For now, Have a wonderful day!

-Me